BECOMING AN ARTIST

CRYSTAL SEA GALLERY    BECOMING AN ARTIST School was a struggle, not from of lack of intelligence, but lack of focus. Back then I was the weird girl who loved woodshop class.   Even down the road, I was convinced that I had to always keep moving to be happy. My 9-5 (realistically 9-8) jobs in marketing and advertising felt overwhelmingly stifling and frustrating to me. But as a single mom, it was the best way I knew to support myself and my son, so I stuck it out for years. As hard as I tried to fit into the corporate group dynamic, I never could.   My mother is an artist and use to try and get me to paint ever since I can remember. She gave me paints, brushes and canvases, which I moved with me from one home to the next, still in their packages, never used. She would tell me it was the cure for what ails you, but I didn’t get it. Yearning for an active and adventurous life, I could not imagine sitting still for hours painting something.   The symptoms started in my mid-twenties and it took several years to figure out, but I was eventually diagnosed with a rare form of cancer called carcinoid. Along with the questionable treatment for it, I was told I had to take it easy and lighten my workload.   So, after careful consideration, I rationally decided to quit my job and buy fixer homes to remodel…myself. That was my version of taking it easy. I loved it and it made me happy, most of the time. Not long after my spontaneous career change, I ran into an old work buddy who had returned to his Alaskan roots as a commercial fisherman. He convinced me that an adventurous vacation on a purse seiner, catching king salmon near the Bering Sea, would be the next logical step. Isn’t that what any average person diagnosed with a rare disease would do?     For three years I bounced from remodeling homes in Washington State to commercial fishing in Alaska, to brine shrimp harvesting on the Great Salt Lake. The third and final year, I lost someone I deeply cared for. He was tragically killed while doing a very hazardous job.   I’m not sure if it was the devastation of losing him as I helplessly watched, or if my denial had finally worn off…maybe both? My invincibility shield instantly dissolved, and soon after returning home I was in the hospital undergoing a very dangerous surgery to save my life.   The recovery was long and painful and followed by countless complications, so I knew that my adventurous days were over, for a while at least. Being a person who only identified with doing and moving, I began to sink into a dark place. I was feeling sorry for myself, continuing to mourn my dear friend and my identity.   I’m a person who only feels worth while if I can see what I’ve accomplished, something tangible. Everyday that went by just made me more depressed and less whole.   It took a while; I’m not going to pretend like it happened overnight. The cliché of being sick and tired of being sick and tired, was an understatement. But it finally hit me; “the cure for what ails you”!  I scrounged through boxes, until I found the paints, brushes and canvases, still in their packages, never used, and I began to paint…     To be continued

SELLING ART – SELLING OUT 

Nine or ten years ago when I first began to sell pieces I’d painted, it was shocking when people continued to say “charge more, your pricing is too cheap”. Even though as artists we work hard, and much time, expense and creativity goes into what we do; I still felt guilty.

Experts would explain the factors behind such reasoning and they made sense, however I still doubted my worthiness. When I was eventually asked to exhibit in New York, I had to get over my insecurities very quickly. If you’re not confident in your worth and justify a price tag of thousands of dollars per piece, there are thousands of other artists who will. 

Artists sell so few pieces with many lulls, it’s almost impossible to make a living at this style of art…after all, we are not rock stars. We aren’t fashion designers; you can’t wear or eat (usually) what we do. In a difficult economy we are one of the first luxuries to get the boot.

When I moved to Los Angeles, I was under the naive notion that I could hit the ground running, but that didn’t happen. It’s very different here and it knocked the wind out of my sales just enough that I could no longer afford the expensive New York gallery fees. So I stumbled into the entertainment industry to make a living. Sadly, painting took a back seat and soon became nonexistent in my life.

Recently, for some reason my art began getting more attention again. I became ‘Most Popular Artist’ on several art websites, so that gave me just enough inspiration to refocus on something I love. But this time it would be different; I decided that charging thousands for my work was unreasonable in this economic climate. This time I would charge only a fraction of what I use to. I wanted to make art more affordable to the masses and continued to try to give back by donating a portion to worthy causes, with no avail.  

Now I’m finding that it doesn’t motivate more people to purchase your work. The art lovers who are more apt to pay ‘cheaper’ prices still think the tag is too high and still won’t buy. The high-end connoisseurs don’t give you a second glance because its under-valued, therefore under appreciated. The fine art galleries don’t accept you for the same reasons. The galleries that previously represented my work and have accepted me for representation would never allow me back, with my current price tags.

Therefore, I have come to the regretful but honest conclusion that I would rather sell art. If that means I have to sell out, then so be it. Immediately following my last benefit show on August 28^th, 2010, my prices are returning to fine art caliber. I’d rather be unpopular than homeless.

However, I have given back through art since I began painting and I will never stop trying.

Crystal Sea~